If
spirituality is about love and kindness, how can I walk on earth without being
suspicious of every man I come in contact with?
Many would feel very sad that they are lumped into the pot with these
few. But, how do I know? Personally, it makes me sad that 1) I have to
be suspicious and 2) that I’m thinking this unkind way.
I’ve
just finished reading Tina Fey’s book Bossypants. She writes about attending workshop about
bullying and girls with Rosalind Wiseman.
Wiseman asks the all women audience to reflect back to the first time
when they were told they were a woman.
Wiseman asked what was that experience like? Fey says she found it very sad to hear
similar responses from her fellow workshop participants. The women described the calls from the street
and I’m not talking about a “hi how are you” or “good morning” kind of
calls. The calls the women described
were the ones that rip into your heart with each utterance. They are calls that make you feel like you
don’t belong and tear you down. They are
the utterances that make you question yourself or question your body part. We remain silent and not responding to the
calls - hoping the person doing this will get tired and go away.
My
first experience? I was called “dog
face” by the guys in my high school. I’d
walk to my locker and they’d come leaning over near enough to whisper it in my
ear. They would then laugh and then
saying loud for people to hear. I kept
my face blank and telling my eyes not to tear up. It was hard to look into the mirror without
feeling very unbeautiful. It was hard
facing the school hallways without feeling embarrassed and wanting to melt into
the shadows.
Looking
back, the whole process of tearing another down a person is anti-spiritual. It makes you feel like you don’t belong. Makes you feel like don’t belong in your
physical body by wanting some other type of “beauty.” Makes you feel like you don’t belong in your
home or here on earth. You’re kept in a perceived
place dictated by others. And, this is
sad. This is not sharing love or
kindness to others.
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