Doing My Part with Small Steps

Elizabeth Boehm (1843-1914) Postcard reads People stand for
different things I stand with my friend

“Ours is not the task of fixing the entire world at once, but of stretching out to mend the part of the world that is within our reach.” ~ Clarissa Pinkola Estes

“Go out in the woods, go out. If you don't go out in the woods nothing will ever happen and your life will never begin.” ~  Clarissa Pinkola Estés, Women Who Run With the Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype


One of the first feminist spirituality books I read was by Clarissa Pinkola Estes: Women who Run With the Wolves. It was a book that was flying off the shelf and several coworkers were reading it during lunch. The book attracted me, because Estes used myth and fairy tales (who doesn’t like myth and fairy tales). The book was an awakening for me. It caused me to really question who I was as a woman back in 1992.

In her essay for Awakin.org. Estes challenges us to fix what we can in our broken world. Today I find myself feeling overwhelmed with an increasing laundry list: environment, economy, housing, food scarcity… However, Estes encourages us to do small things like: showing up for our children’s events; meal training it for a friend who is shut in; and eating meatless Mondays. Yes, she acknowledges that there are really big problems. But, we need to focus on what “I” the individual can do. One example is cleaning up the litter problem in your neighborhood. It is a daunting task to do all by yourself, but you can keep your lawn tidy. Her key message is to show up and to keep showing up.

My dad walks about three miles a day every morning. Each day he takes along a trash bag and picks up the litter along his path. He has been doing this before it became a Swedish trend called Plogging. Dad follows John Muir hiker’s creed of “leaving nothing but footprints.” My point is Dad is doing what he can on his morning walks; and he keeps showing up.

Estes discusses the importance of showing up. We are in relationship with each other. By doing what we can, our soul’s light inspires others. It is easy to show up during “golden times,” she writes. But, we are even more needed during the stormy times. Your light inspires and helps another.

###

A Prayer

By Clarissa Pinkola Estés, The Faithful Gardener: A Wise Tale About That Which Can Never Die

Refuse to fall down
If you cannot refuse to fall down,
refuse to stay down.
If you cannot refuse to stay down,
lift your heart toward heaven,
and like a hungry beggar,
ask that it be filled.
You may be pushed down.
You may be kept from rising.
But no one can keep you from lifting your heart
toward heaven
only you.
It is in the middle of misery
that so much becomes clear.
The one who says nothing good
came of this,
is not yet listening.

Clarissa Pinkola Estes

###

I keep thinking Estes is all about kindness shared.  I look on the news and see on my Facebook feed pictures of angry people and videos who care only about winning at any cost.   I have to ask myself where is compassion and empathy for another? When I have asked a person who displays this type of behavior; they are demeaning and condescending to me. I find this ends up as a no win solution. Maybe that's the point it is a no win solution. And, if I really care about the issue I need to find other ways around it that doesn't involves them. These are the small steps I need to keep showing up for.

ARTUAL: Questions to journal about:

What do I have control over?
Where can I make a difference?
Where can I make an impact and not get burnt out?
What are my values for living?
How can I stay true to my values with my beloveds?


Resource:

13 Reasons Why You Should Read “Women Who Run With the Wolves” Instead by Kami Leon (Cliff notes of the book)

Pikola Estes, Clarissa (2018) We were Made for these times. The Heart of the Matter. 

Holes that need mending

Illustration for Little Mermaid by Asami Kiyokawa. 2007. Fabric

“For nothing is fixed, forever and forever and forever, it is not fixed; the earth is always shifting, the light is always changing, the sea does not cease to grind down rock. Generations do not cease to be born, and we are responsible to them because we are the only witnesses they have. The sea rises, the light fails, lovers cling to each other, and children cling to us. The moment we cease to hold each other, the sea engulfs us and the light goes out.” ― James Baldwin

“Sometimes that’s all it takes. Just one person to turn everything on its head. Remind you of the person you were.” ― Samantha Towle, Trouble

“You know, life fractures us all into little pieces. It harms us, but it's how we glue those fractures back together that make us stronger.” ― Carrie Jones, Entice

There seems to be a lot of things that need mending in my life, and I am not just talking about the loose buttons, ripped skirt hems, and snagged holes in my sweaters. My son’s used car’s engine is beyond repair. My butterfly bush needs pruning again due to an ice storm. Did I mention I have family relationships that need transformation after ten years of not speaking and a reckoning is coming soon due to a death of a favorite Uncle. Then, there is the living room walls need re-painted. Writing this list down, they all seem pretty restorable. (Okay not the car.)


Really what I am driving at is something bigger. Right now. At this moment. A chasm is expanding. I watch the hole rip wider from a leader who is rallying others to stalk, beat-up, and deface personal property of those who are different (e.g., racism, sexism, abilities, agism).  No matter how much I attempt or my friends attempt to stabilize it by sewing patches or knitting stitches--it grows.  I knew there was this undercurrent, but I never knew its extent.  It feels far worse than having my big toe poke through a hole in my hose while I’m at work and don’t have a replacement pair.   

Syende fiskerpige by Anna Ancher. 1890. oil on canvas.
See it at Randers Kunstmuseum 

Two Sewing 

By Hazel Hall, 1921

The wind is sewing with needles of rain;
With shining needles of rain
It stitches into the thin
Cloth of earth—in
In, in, in.
(Oh, the wind has often sewed with me!—
One, two, three.)

Spring must have fine things
To wear. Like other springs.
Of silken green the grass must be
Embroidered. (One and two and three.)
Then every crocus must be made
So subtly as to seem afraid
Of lifting color from the ground
And after crocuses the round
Heads of tulips, and all the fair
Intricate garb that Spring will wear
The wind must sew with needles of rain,
With shining needles of rain
Stitching into the thin
Cloth of earth—in,
In, in, in—
For all the springs of futurity
(One, two, three.)



I don't have any easy answer for this problem.  I saw this video yesterday by Robby Fischer entitled: "Fight Despair with Defiance."  It gave me an energy boost of hope.  The take home message for me was a radical and defiant person takes action against a bully by using their gifts and talents to make a difference.  It isn't about changing the bully's life. Instead, the defiant person creates the community they want to have no matter what the bully says.  

The bully and his/her crowd is not going to listen to your analysis and logic.  Instead they will use your information and turn it around by lying, discrediting, intimidating and isolating you. 

Fischer calls us to use our gifts and talents.  If your gifts and talents are chaining yourself to fences during a protest--use it.  If your gifts and talents are gardening--use it and fill your community's pantries with food and teach kids to grow food. If your gifts and talents are art, music, or writing--use it.  This is what will overpower the bullies and their followers in the end.   Your gifts and talents creating a beloved community.

BIG TAKE HOME: Don't tear each other down.  If you aren't into marching--don't tear down the people who are into marching.  If you aren't into picking up the phone and calling to voice your opinion--don't tear that person who is has this passion to do this.  If you aren't into gardening--don't tear that person down who is putting food on the table.

INSTEAD: Honor and celebrate how we each show our gifts of courage against the bully by creating a community where kindness rules and everyone has a voice and feels like they belong.  

Kindness Tea Party - Alternative Narratives

Three Graces by Marie Bracquemond,
1880 oil.See it at Musee d'Orsay, Paris

"Do your little bit of good where you are; it’s those little bits of good put together that overwhelm the world.” – Desmond Tutu

“All I'm saying is, kindness don't have no boundaries.”
― Kathryn Stockett, The Help

"Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” – Leo Buscaglia

We live in a world that is constantly telling us stories. These narratives have a way of shaping our lives.Their plot lines describe what or who to be afraid of; what is a beautiful face or body type; what we should eat; how you should act; or what success looks like. It is hard to escape these stories because they are reinforced by the media and the number of hearts and the reposts. I often find it hard to escape from their grip of my subconscious. Sociologists call these stories the dominant narrative. 

Jeyne Roberts writes, “There are three sides to every story. Yours. Mine. What really happened.” The dominant narrative is a one-sided story. It pits my story against your story. If your story wins. It becomes the story that is perceived as valid and real. However, there’s a problem with listening to only one side, you don’t get to hear the stories from other perspectives. By not hearing all the stories, I believe you miss out on the nuances of the story. And, if you hear a similar story, you may jump to a conclusion influenced by past plot lines.

I a firm believer of making your own decisions and coming up with your own solutions to problems.  Following the CCWWW philosophy, you need to put on your lab coat and unearth different viewpoints.  You also need to make sure your solutions consider others wants and needs.  By hearing only one viewpoint and choosing the dominant narrative or one story, puts you in conflict with the CCWWW philosophy.  Meaning: everyone should feel like they belong, they are valued and they are heard.  (It doesn’t mean you have to agree with the other person’s story only hear them out).

Song

By John Fuller 

You don’t listen to what I say.
When I lean towards you in the car
You simply smile and turn away.

It’s been like this most of the day,

sitting and sipping, bar after bar:
You don’t listen to what I say.

You squeeze a lemon from a tray,

And if you guess how dear you are
You simply smile and turn away.

Beyond the hairline of the bay

the steamers call that shore is far.
You don’t listen to what I say:

Surely there’s another way?

The waiter brings a small guitar.
You simply smile and turn away.

Sometimes I think you are too gay,

smiling and smiling, hour after hour.
You don’t listen to what I say.
You simply smile and turn away.

Fuller, John. “Song.” Collected Poems.  London: Chatto & Windus, 1996. 

Kindness Tea Party

I have been doing a lot of reflecting at the end of the year.  One story I have stumbled on is the number of people who state they feel like don’t belong or they are not heard.  I keep hearing and reading in the news and in my Facebook feed.  I’ve also noticed that this story doesn’t seem to fit with the dominant narratives playing out in the media: us versus them, liberals versus conservatives… It makes the story a little more complicated because both us and them are telling this tale. 

The first time I heard about this story of not feeling connected was in a random essay on Facebook.  The story immediately made me think of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs and number 3 on his pyramid: love and belonging; (and the OSU professor who droned on in a large, hot lecture hall).  Maslow identified that humans need to feel that they belong and are accepted in a group.  We are mammals that require social connection to love and be loved.  This loving connection has increases our survival as a species.  If this need isn’t met than the affected human may develop a laundry list of psychosis: loneliness, social anxiety, depression, and ultimately people who can’t form a relationship. 

And, how do you prevent or fix this problem?

One activity I am launching this year with another co-worker, is a Kindness Tea Party in the work setting. The Tea Party is a magical opportunity for people at my work to connect through food and listening. We are holding it in the late afternoon. I’ve sent the invitation out to about 100 people (paper and via e-mail) and asked them to bring their own cups (fancy hats are welcomed too). Twenty people have responded saying they are planning on coming.

Equipment Needed:

Tablecloth
Napkins
Electric Coffee Urn (Earl Gray Tea)
Electric Pot to heat water for (Hibiscus tea and Green Tea)
Two containers to make the other two teas
Cream container
Sugar
Spoons
Food (shortbread, brownies and a tin of lemon cookies)

No tea is complete without fortunes.  We decided to print off fortune cookie messages and place them in a bowl. 

What's so funny, 'bout peace, love and understanding

Elvis Costello and Elmo on Sesame Street

“Any fool can know. The point is to understand.” ~ Albert Enstein

  “Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”  ~ Carl Jung


I have been really thinking about what is going around me lately.  Trying to explain things I believe in (e.g., social justice, why PBS should be funded, why just having lists of women's names in a binder are limiting, why healthcare should be for everyone, a process model everyone can use, cookie ingredients, relationships, why human trafficking needs to end, why access to birth control and emergency contraceptives is important ....fill in the blank) Well it all gets messed up..... 

I find myself coming back to living out of love.  Specifically, thinking about the act of giving and receiving love.  And, it is very hard down here on earth to at least keep in balance. 

If we were to believe we are all precious beings of love rather than having an attitude of accomodation - maybe we would get along better.  I've been meditating a lot on the balance between the iron and pearl pentagam and how to reclaim unity.  I keep coming back to trying to fully understanding how the Love Spell works.

Elvis Cstello - well he says it all.   Check it out.  What's so funny 'about peace, love and understanding. 

Nineteen, The Sun and Namaste

Sunflower field

"I honor the place within you where the entire Universe resides; I honor the place within you of love, of light, of truth, of peace; I honor the place within you, where, when you are in that place in you, and I am in that place in me, there is only one of us." ~ Mahatma Gandhi

“We are members one of another; so that you cannot injure or help your neighbor without injuring or helping yourself.” ~ George Bernard Shaw

"This we know: All things are connected like the blood that unites us. We did not weave the web of life,  We are merely a strand in it. Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves."  ~ Chief Seattle

I parked in lot 19 today and the first thing that came to my mind was fields of sunflowers growing on the plains of Kansas, my version of the tarot card.  I can see the sunny blue sky, orange petals with large black centers, swaying a hello in the wind.   These Van Gogh colors symbolically remind me to do what makes me happy.  I get that lighthearted feeling that everything is going to be okay, it will all turn out right just put on a smiley Band-Aid and find something to laugh about.

Nature has a way of reminding me that everything is interconnected.  The sun not only gives me warmth but is also one of the needed ingredients to make my garden grow vegetables.  (Those chloroplast within the plant cell use the sun rays for creating energy.)  In turn, I eat them in wonderful salads and stir-fried in ginger and soy sauce over rice – each bite gives me energy.  The sun’s energy is transferred to me and I become connected to the sun and the vegetable plant.  The question becomes what will I do with this energy?  Do I share this power freely or keep it to myself?

I smiled as I walked the ¼ mile into work.  Funny – it is like a chain reaction.  Others see you smile and they smile to.

http://yoginidebi.com/

The Sun by Mary Oliver

Have you ever seen

anything

in your life

more wonderful

than the way the sun,

every evening,

relaxed and easy,

floats toward the horizon

and into the clouds or the hills,

or the rumpled sea,

and is gone–

and how it slides again

out of the blackness,

every morning,

on the other side of the world,

like a red flower

streaming upward on its heavenly oils,

say, on a morning in early summer,

at its perfect imperial distance–

and have you ever felt for anything

such wild love–

do you think there is anywhere, in any language,

a word billowing enough

for the pleasure

that fills you,

as the sun

reaches out,

as it warms you

as you stand there,

empty-handed–

or have you too

turned from this world–

or have you too

gone crazy

for power,

for things?

    

~#~

I went to yoga class at lunch.  Talk about law of coincidence or Jung’s Synchronicity?  My Instructor announced that this Yoga session would be devoted to our interconnectedness.  He didn’t know what was going on in Central Ohio, but felt that the Universe was offering opportunities to learn about this concept with the storms and accidents. 

7 Sun Salutations: purity of spirit, forgiveness, service to others, compassion, faith, healing and wisdom.

~#~

On June30th a terrible storm came through Central Ohio.  Winds were clocked up to 85 miles an hour.  T called me at work that afternoon and asked if I wanted a ride.  I thought he was joking and said: “I rode my bike home yesterday in this heat.  It can’t be any hotter since lunch (98 F).”  He asked if I had risen out of cubicle land to look out the window.  The sky was pitch black looking more like 5 pm during December.  I requested a ride home for my bike and myself.  I felt like Dorothy in the Kansas.  T gave a ride to one of my walking co-workers.

As of this week (July 13) out in the rural areas of Central Ohio, there are still people without power.  Besides not having power for at least a fan to move the hot humid air, many can’t run the pumps for their wells.  My grid was one of the lucky ones; we were one of the first up and running.  I immediately offered my outlets for electronics or someplace to escape the heat. 

Strangely, these events haven’t stopped.  During these last two weeks, several major accidents on Columbus’ main freeways have managed to snarl traffic during the morning rush hour: a deadly crash, a car drove off the freeway into a building, and today a train derailment with an explosion. 

But the news has offered up numerous stories about people in Central Ohio showing kindness and love.  People have ask those without electricity over for supper in a cool house; stringing an electrical cord across the street so a neighbor’s freezer can remain on; created brigades with power saws to move trees out of the streets; made room in freezers for someone’s recently put up peaches; or drove someone to work because the bus is too packed to let person on. 

1+9=10=1 – weirdly it all ends up back to the magician and E=mc2 with that WOW energy that can jazz up the world or tear it down.  I notice that many seem to be sharing the magical spell of kindness by reaching out to others.

Namaste

My Yoga instructor ends our time ritually saying “Namaste.”  This simple gesture acknowledges the soul in one by the soul in another.  Translated poetically this ancient Sanskrit means: “the divine light in me, respects the divine light in you.”  Namaste is a symbol of love, respect and gratitude towards another allowing us to come together energetically as one.

To carry out the Namaste gesture face a partner.  Place your hands together at your heart chakra, close your eyes and bow your head saying: “Namaste.” 

On a spiritual level, bringing your hands together at your heart chakra increases the Divine energy within you.  By bowing your head and closing your eyes , it helps quiets the mind in order to hear the messages from the Divine (Motherfather Spirit).   This gesture reminds us to live from our hearts by doing so we can see the beauty and love in all people. 

Activities

Howard’s Yoga Shake-up Blessing Chant

Done after Sun Salutation to loosen things up

Close your eyes and bounce shaking all your joints – think rag doll. After each line chant “omm” or “aumm”

May we learn to forgive.

Ommm

May we show compassion to others, especially the electric company who is doing the best they can.

Ommm

May we invite others over who are without electricity.

Ommm

May we ask someone without electricity to dinner.

Ommm

May we be willing to accept invitations to dinner.

Ommm

May we check on a neighbor to see if they are okay.

Ommm

May we be willing to offer a person a ride

Ommm

May we learn we are all connected and everything we do affects someone else.

Ommm

May we love more and live more from our hearts.

Ommm

Omm is believed to be the original sound that rose at the time of creation.  It is called the sound of the universe.  Chanting omm allows us to reconnect with creation’s movement: the waves against the shore, the movement of birds flying, the rising and setting of the sun and moon.  We remember our place in the symphony of Divine love.

Magical Spell of Kindness

Art done by JaiMa James Buidinick

 

 

“Magic that sparkles, laughs and dances; magic you can feel in your own body; magic that takes your breath away; a beautiful magic that protects and enriches everyone who touches it; magic that really does stuff…” ~ Starfields

“I shall pass through this world but once. Any good therefore that I can do or any kindness that I can show to any human being, let me do it now. Let me not defer or neglect it for I shall not pass this way again.” ~ Steven Grellet

“Loving kindness is not just love for some particular person, but the spiritual state of loving everybody.” ~ Tolstoy

 

There is a woman in my town whose Ohio salt rusted car is pasted with bumper stickers.  When anyone sits behind her at a traffic light you can’t help reading the messages: “Peace Now, Pay it Forward, Commit Random Acts of Kindness Daily, Have you laughed today?  LOVE Overcomes Intolerance…”  She is the same woman who dresses in Talbots' casual at our monthly gallery hop.  Instead of drinking wine and looking at the artwork, she walks up and down the ‘View’ passing out yellow smiley face confetti.  During past Memorial Day parades dressed in red, white and blue, she walks with the children cyclists carrying a sign that reads ‘Kindness is Patriotic.’  There is a special kind of magic she radiates; you can’t stop smiling.

In analyzing what this woman is doing falls into the category of what Starfields describes as “THINK magically, and ACT in a magical manner.”  The woman is following one of the master laws of the universe: You reap what you sow.  In her case, she is sowing kindness and believing this is the way to create a gentler, more loving world for all.  It has been my experience that she has never asked for anything in return.  She just wants all beings to be happy which of course seems to go against the nature of our popular culture for competitiveness. 

I believe her enchantment is part of an old group of spells whose purpose is to make other’s feel good.  In my readings, I have discovered that kindness spells are a subgroup that fall under the Classification of Love.  Unlike other spells that people have to learn and carry out under guidance, everyone is born with the ability to create and share love and kindness spells.   If we choose, we too can sow this spell by weaving acts of kindness into our day by sharing Good Mornings, Thank you and thoughtful gestures like a smile.  My experience is that not many people are doing this because they equate these spells to an economic gain or they haven’t been given an accurate recipe to follow. 

One problem I have observed is we tend to share love and kindness spells like we do money.  We hoard it, deposit in the bank for a rainy day or the right investment (i.e., If I’m kind to them - I know they will be kind to me.)  Magical spells under the Love Classification don’t work this way.  If you want to get the biggest bang for your bucks – you need to be generous in sharing love and kindness.  You need to be what my Grandmother would say as a spendthrift by handing it out willy-nilly or spontaneously to anyone on the street.  Additionally, these types of spells should be handed out without any expectation of getting anything in return.  These spells aren’t about you; it is about sharing with others.

In cases of Kindness spells, I’ve found many people are carrying out a modified recipe missing heart energy.  One reason may be that the spells are written in a coded manner within a Book of Shadows.  Historically, this has been to protect the owner from being burnt or the non-initiate from using them inappropriately.  I too am guilty of carrying out modified recipes missing heart.  My extended list of reasons include that I’m exhausted after working all day, being a Mom, taxi driver to sporting events, going to school and not paying attention to details; or deciding to change the ingredients by either cutting corners or wanting to do my own thing.   In all these cases, I have found these spells don’t turn out the way they are intended.  It’s like exchanging applesauce for butter when making cookies.  The result is a low-fat healthier cookie but the texture isn’t right.  The same can be said with those carrying out Kindness spells, they come out insincere. 

Activities

Sunshine Blueberry Mini Muffins

Z. Budapest writes in Goddess in the Office (91) a spell for bringing more cooperation into the workplace.  Her recipe includes baking cookies with traditional spices that promote friendship and happiness.  I’ve produced the same results with my mini muffins.  Similiar to her's, I've jazzed up my muffins by adding runes and magical energy.

My magical ingredients are lemons and blueberries.  Blueberries are known as a wonderful anti-oxidant today, but in witches’ lore they were used for protection.  Witches were known for eating blueberry tarts when under a psychic attack.  Lemons are known for promoting purification, love, and friendship.  The combinations of the two ingredients have brightened up my office  when I’ve shared them with heart.  And, not to mention - these mini muffins feel like a burst of sunshine on your tongue especially on one of those gray Ohio winter days. 

Ingredients

2 eggs
¾ cup sugar
1/3 cup of vegetable oil
3 Tbsp. fresh lemon juice
1 Tbsp. grated lemon peel
1 ¼ cups of all purpose flour
1 tsp. baking soda
¼ tsp. ground nutmeg
¼ tsp. ground ginger
1/8 tsp salt
¾ cup fresh blueberries or frozen

Preheat oven to 350 F.  Line mini muffin tins.  Stir together dry ingredients.  With a mixer, beat eggs and sugar together until pale and thick, about 2 minutes.  Add oil in thin stream.  Stir in lemon juice and peel by hand.  Mix in flour mixture by hand using a stirring motion with the following rune signs: Wunjo (i.e., joy & happiness) and Mannaz (i.e., cooperation, teamwork, collaboration, and aid from others).   While stirring these signs into the batter, visualize their meaning using the energy from your heart.  Lightly fold in blueberries. 

Pour into muffin tins and bake for 15-25 minutes until lightly brown on the top and toothpick comes out clean.  Share abundantly. 

Starfields' Kindness Spell

All you need to do is to ...

a) start to treat yourself with love, respect and kindness (that includes the way you speak to yourself, think about yourself, dress yourself, touch yourself, feed yourself, protect yourself, and entertain/delight yourself);

and

b) start treating other people, especially those who you perceive as isolated, with attention, love, respect and kindness.

This changes YOU *into* someone who will reap what they sow.

It makes you into a better person.

It's ongoing, but it is absolutely essential to leading a full and happy life.

KINDNESS
by Naomi Shihab Nye

Before you know what kindness really is

you must lose things,

feel the future dissolve in a moment

like salt in a weakened broth.

What you held in your hand,

what you counted and carefully saved,

all this must go so you know

how desolate the landscape can be

between the regions of kindness.

How you ride and ride

thinking the bus will never stop,

the passengers eating maize and chicken

will stare out the window forever.

Before you learn the tender gravity of kindness,

you must travel where the Indian in a white poncho

lies dead by the side of the road.

You must see how this could be you,

how he too was someone

who journeyed through the night with plans

and the simple breath that kept him alive.

Before you know kindness as the deepest thing inside,

you must know sorrow as the other deepest thing.

You must wake up with sorrow.

You must speak to it till your voice

catches the thread of all sorrows

and you see the size of the cloth.

Then it is only kindness that makes any sense anymore,

only kindness that ties your shoes

and sends you out into the day to mail letters and purchase bread,

only kindness that raises its head

from the crowd of the world to say

It is I you have been looking for,

and then goes with you everywhere

like a shadow or a friend.

History of Random Acts of Kindness Movement:

In the spring of 1993, Professor Chuck Wall was teaching a human relations class at Bakersfield College. He was pondering his next class assignment and was half listening to the radio news when he heard:  'We have another random act of senseless violence to report.'

In the seconds that followed, he coined the phrase.

'I just took out the word "violence" and stuck in the word "kindness". All of a sudden I had a great phrase that turned a negative into a positive.'

Later that day he walked into his classroom, and told eighteen students, ranging in age from 18 to 67, to pick up their pens. The week's assignment: 'Today I will commit one random act of senseless kindness.'

Wall says that hands went up and the students seemed confused.  One student complained: 'I don't know what I'm supposed to do.'

Wall explains: 'They wanted me to tell them what kindness was about. I insisted they figure it out for themselves