Reviving the Tiger Ritual

Katsushika Hokusai, Woodblock print, 1849

“Each of us must confront our own fears, must come face to face with them. How we handle our fears will determine where we go with the rest of our lives. To experience adventure or to be limited by the fear of it.”  - Judy Blume, Tiger Eyes 

"So this is what I will do. I will gather together my past and look. I will see a thing that has already happened. the pain that cut my spirit loose. I will hold that pain in my hand until it becomes hard and shiny, more clear. And then my fierceness can come back, my golden side, my black side. I will use this sharp pain to penetrate my daughter's tough skin and cut her tiger spirit loose. She will fight me, because this is the nature of two tigers. But I will win and giver her my spirit, because this is the way a mother loves her daughter." - Amy Tan, Joy Luck Club

"But the tigers come at night/ With their voices soft as thunder/ As they tear your hope apart/ As they turn your dream to shame"  Susan Boyle singing Britain's Got Talent  "I dreamed a dreamed."

~~~

As you have been reading, I devoted these past four weeks studying aspects of the tiger power.  Motherfather Spirit kept presenting me with one thing that zaps my tiger power: my inner critic.  I declare myself a strong woman, but I too, have an inner critic that gives me comments about my unworthiness and not-enoughness and my imperfections.  I've been on several "list serves"  and I realized I'm not alone.  Others have their own inner critic and it functions in the same way: zapping our tiger power. 

In her book, Tiger's Wife, Tea Obreht describes the tigers in the zoo.  Bombs are exploding in an unnamed Balkan city, noise and the underlying fear causes stress to animals.  The caged tigers begin eating their young and one gnaws away at his leg until it is becomes gangrene.  There have been points in my life that I have allowed my inner critic to consume my tiger power.  My inner critic knows my weak points: not a good mother; a mother should be at home; only being able to have one child; art work that is rejected, my career is in a public health issue that will never stop (violence prevention).  And then there is society and the media that echo my critic...  During these times, I've walked into my work cubicle to hide or have sat in front of the television--staring unable to work, to create, to make.  I become like Obreht's tiger eating my creations before they can grow up. 

Intellectually, I know that this voice isn't truthful and works out of fear or wanting to keep me safe. 

Susan Boyle

This tiger study has also allowed me to recognize that I must have a bag of magic tricks to stop the inner critic.  Mine includes poems, songs, inspiration youtube videos that tell the critic "haa haa. take that."  One of my favorites is watching Susan Boyle's Britian's Got Talent audition.  She boldly walks onto the stage facing an audience that is under the "Mirror Mirror on the Wall Spell."  Susan is a middle aged woman with streaks of gray hair; who by the way she talks and appears looks like she didn't have any talent.  The (spell bound) cynical audience laughed at her comments.  But, when she opened her mouth to sing; there was a dramatic change.  "I know what they were thinking, but why should it matter as long as I can sing? It's not a beauty contest."  Susan Boyle told The Sunday Times.  She had her tiger spirit on that day.  It inspires mine.  

Music has always shook up my inner critic.  Singing songs while twirling, dancing, and acting out the lyrics... the voice gets drowned out.  


Artual
Create your own magic bag to build up your tiger spirit.  The following are on my play list.

Ode to Joy - Flash mob 
Beethoven

Talkin' bout a Revolution
Tracy Chapman

MOANA song "I Am Moana" (Song of the Ancestors)
Auli'i Cravalho

Rise Up
Andra Day

Girl On Fire
Alicia Keys

Sunny Side of Street
Billy Holliday “Lady Day”

One Love 
Bob Marley

Defying Gravity - Wicked
Idina Menzel and Kristin Chenoweth

Taming the Tiger
Joni Mitchel

Roar        

• Katy Perry
• • • 
      
  • Look What We've Become
  • • Grace Potter
    • • • • 
            
        • • I Ain’t Down Yet - Unsinkable Molly Brown
          • Debbie Reynolds
          • • 
              
        • • Waka Waka (This Time for Africa) (The Official 2010 FIFA World Cup™ Song)
          • • Shakira
            • • 
                
      • Mother Within
      • • Tina Turner 

A Gaelic Blessing 
John Rutter

All Things Bright and Beautiful (Makes me think of my Grandmother) John Rutter

Hag Stones: Seeing through the glamour

Single Form by Barbara Hepworth. 1961-1964. Bronze.  See it
at the United Nation's Building, New York.

"We must begin to see ourselves as existing in society not as isolated selves but as part of the whole. " 
– Rev. William Barber.

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." — Marianne Williamson

“We are deeply committed to a society where people love one another and don’t kick people when they are down.” - Rev. William Barber

THIS IS AN OFFICIAL ALERT 
FROM THE FAIRY GODMOTHER’S ASSOCIATION

FEAR GLAMOUR

The Fairy GodMother’s Association (FGMA) has just issued an alert. They are investigating an outbreak of “fear glamour.” This magical spell is part of a series of enchantments that fall under Terror Management Series.  It is used to create a "culture of fear."

People who are infected show a mild to extreme, irrational fear towards humanity.  It is largely based on assumptions. FGMA have reported infected people appear to rely on others (including the media, Facebook, and snapchat) to spoon-feed how things should be. Ultimately, FGMA has identified that the spell is being used for the following: to silence or censor people, to isolate people, and pit people against each other based on differences (i.e., rural vs. urban, poor vs. rich, college educated vs. GED, gay vs. straight, conservative vs. liberal, man vs. woman, black vs. white – you get my point).

When talking to infected persons, they appear amnesic regarding their country’s history and/or lack the awareness of the stories about the struggles their ancestresses and ancestors experienced. In extreme cases, the infected person’s fear seems based on their lack of knowing their rights or caring for the rights of other. These individuals describe having a complete sense of hopelessness and a willingness to withdraw from community activities. They are hoping for a knight in shining armor rather than rolling up their sleeves to work on hard moral issues.

This glamour is highly infectious. The U.S.’s last outbreak began in 1950 ~ 1956 and lasted through the 1980 and is commonly referred to the Second Red Scare, Cold War, or McCarthyism.

Recommended Actions for Prevention:

• There has been some success using a Hag Stone. The stones have the ability to cut through the glamour. The uninfected look through the hole and can see the truth. However, there is an inadequate supply for the stones from Europe due to political control of imports. FGMA is asking people to share.  FGMA has had additional success using the strategically placed Barbara Hepworth's sculptures.   
• The uninfected should also consider drawing conclusions for themselves. FGMA recommends reading, active listening, having civil conversations with neighbors, and drawing a conclusion for yourself. They also recommend the of the analysis should be around the moral issue: how do we treat each other. Are we generous or stingy? Kind or a bully? Sympathetic or unfeeling? Welcoming or unfriendly?
• Secondary Prevention for mild cases.  Reducing media and social media consumption and attending a local community event: school play, band concert, helping the food pantry, meditation or prayer circle, or discussion learning group around a moral issue you are passionate about.  

###

Let Them Not Say
by Jane Hirshfield, 1953

Let them not say: we did not see it.
We saw.

Let them not say: we did not hear it.
We heard.

Let them not say: they did not taste it.
We ate, we trembled.

Let them not say: it was not spoken, not written.
We spoke,
we witnessed with voices and hands.

Let them not say: they did nothing.
We did not-enough.

Let them say, as they must say something:
A kerosene beauty.

It burned.
Let them say we warmed ourselves by it,
read by its light, praised,
and it burned.

###

This past week I marched in one of the many international women’s marches. We were a sea of pink hats each made to fit the style of the maker. My friend and I were wearing ones I made. The count estimates more than three million people in 500 US cities took to the streets with our signs, slogans, chants and song. There were lone marchers around a suburb block and several on hospital floors. I know there were many women who feared to come out and there were those who thought it was a waste of time or the marchers were sore losers.

For me, the march gave me a jolt like being knocked off my feet from being touched by a fairy wand. The march challenges and inspires me to be re-committed to helping people and to mend holes. The march also reinforced my rights as a citizen of the USA stated in my constitution: “Amendment I: Congress shall make no law ... abridging ... the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances."

These written rights I have are a privilege other people, mostly women may not have internationally. I also had the privilege of time to attend the march in my home state; a working person may have not had that time. But the purpose for writing down the quote above is for all to see so it can help break this spell of fear.

Mary Beard takes on Mirror Mirror on the Wall Spell

If you don't know who Mary Beard is - she is a Cambridge academic who can tell you anything you want to know about those Ancient Romans. 

When she made an unpopular comment about immigration and the British social service systems; the Mirror Mirror Spells were unleased onto her blog. 

Check out the article in the NY Times today (2/16/2013).

In Britain, an Authority on the Past Stares Down a Nasty Modern Storm
JANUARY was a busy month for Mary Beard, a Cambridge academic who is the closest thing, if it exists, to a celebrity classics professor.  In just a few weeks, Ms. Beard, who has helped popularize the study of antiquity through television and a lively blog, “A Don’s Life,” turned 58; finished a draft of her book on Roman laughter; became an officer of the Order of the British Empire; and attended the funeral of a lifelong friend and editor, Peter Carson.

Turner, Lark. In Britain, an Authority on the Past Stares Down a Nasty Modern Storm. The New York Times. 15 Feb. 2013. Web. 16 Feb. 2013. http://www.nytimes.com/2013/02/16/world/europe/mary-beard-classics-professor-battles-internet-attacks.html?_r=0

Mirror Mirror on the Wall Spell New Research

More Plus-Size Models Could Change Women’s Obsession With Thin Bodies

British women's obsession for thin bodies could potentially be changed if advertising showed more plus size models, suggests a preliminary study published November 7.

Journal Source:  Lynda G. Boothroyd, Martin J. Tovée, Thomas V. Pollet. Visual Diet versus Associative Learning as Mechanisms of Change in Body Size Preferences. PLoS ONE, 2012; 7 (11): e48691 DOI: 10.1371/journal.pone.0048691

Durham University. "More plus-size models could change women’s obsession with thin bodies." ScienceDaily, 7 Nov. 2012. Web. 8 Nov. 2012.  http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2012/11/121107200146.htm

Mirror Mirror Spell Tries to Reek Havoc at the Olympics

Yes, I've been tuned to the Olympics these past two weeks.  I can only dream of competing at the level these amazing athletes have done across my TV screen.

This has been an amazing historic Olympics.  Every country competing has sent women athletes.  How cool is that? And a man with prosthetic legs made it to the semi finals in his race.... Amazing. 

Saddly, the Mirror Mirror Spell has showed up.  I’ve hyperlinked to three articles.  All I can say is: “Really?”  I thought the Olympics are about playing your game at the top level with athletes from all over the world.  The ancient Greeks used the games to honor the Gods and Goddesses.  Focusing on one's hair and body shapes and sizes to tear another down isn't about honoring the temple of another or honoring any Gods or Goddesses for that matter.  

I heard a quote yesterday - "We are all images of love only we come in different disguises and with different talents."  I think this concept is another key in breaking the Mirror Mirror Spell.  

Olympic Weightlifter Holley Mangold Says Get Over Her Fat

Deborah Dunham

Since when did the Olympics become all about being sexy versus competing, representing your country and striving for a gold medal? Like, suddenly the way a female athlete looks is an open invitation for the body-snarking, fat-shaming comments to begin. But if you ask American weightlifter, Holley Mangold (who happens to be the heaviest woman at the Games this summer), she is proud of her weight and is fighting back–and so are many other Olympic women. (Read More)

Read more: http://blisstree.com/look/olympic-weightlifter-holley-mangold-says-get-over-her-fat-738/#ixzz234JC0nKW

Fat? We are fit. Get over it, say women athletes

Brenda Goldsmith

American weightlifter Holley Mangold tips the scales at 346 pounds (157 kilograms) and she is proud of being the heaviest woman at the London Olympics.

Mangold, 22, who competed in the women's 75 kilogram-plus division, is one of growing number of women athletes speaking out at their frustration with the public scrutiny of their body size and image rather than their fitness and skills.

At the 2012 Olympics, a list of top female athletes have hit back at critics who have called them fat including British heptathlon champion Jessica Ennis, Australian swimmer Liesel Jones, and the Brazilian women's soccer team. (Read More) http://news.yahoo.com/fat-fit-over-women-athletes-193539328--spt.html

Gabby Douglas' Hair: How Did Olympic History Turn Into A Hair Debate?

Julee Wilson

As the controversy surrounding Gabby Douglas' hair drags on, we're left wondering: how did it get to this point?

It's still shocking that while Douglas was busy rewriting Olympic history and making the country proud, a string of negative Twitter comments about her "unkempt" hair stole the spotlight. Some are blaming the media for that shift in focus to Douglas' hair, while others see the story as a segue into a much broader subject: black women's hair.  (Read More) http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/08/08/gabby-douglas-hair-debate_n_1756835.html

Mirror Mirror on the wall spell

A Young Girl Looking in a Mirror

“The body is a sacred garment.” ~ Martha Graham

“If anything is sacred, the human body is sacred.” ~ Walt Whitman

“Know that your body is the temple of the living God; there you may seek communion. There you may seek counsel as to the choices to be made, the directions to be taken.” ~ Edgar Cayce

“You can safely assume that you’ve created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do.” ~ Anne Lamott

Confessions: 
1) I have never been able to scry.  Nor was I able to see my true love on Imbolic night.  2) I have a love/hate relationship with my mirror.

Phew that is out of the way…..

I consider myself a typical woman who was brought up in the 1960-70’s with the Disney Original Three:  Snow White, Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty.  I remember how I’d sit with my dolls and my brother’s borrowed GI Joe (casted as a Prince) and reenact the movie plots including the happy songs.  Little did I know, I’d been mesmerized by the subtle messages these tales gave me about beauty, body image and women’s relationships with one and other.  You might say, I’d drunk the Kool-Aid or would that be looked into the mirror and became like the poor angry Queen in Snow White - struck with body anxiety each time I caught my reflection in the mirror or look at another woman. 

Traditionally, fairy tales were a form of moral lessons.  They were mostly told by women to entertain their children while they spun or did housework.  When these oral stories were finally written down, some of their essences were erased.  Yes, the plot lines are roughly the same, but there is evidence showing how writers like Charles Perrault and the Grimm brothers changed the stories.  In Perrault’s case, he made the heroines more appealing to the Seventeen Century French Royal Court.  The heroin’s character was re-written to emphasize model virtues for a sovereign wife: enjoys and volunteers for housework, obedient and doesn’t display having any opinion, exhibits physical beauty that includes being demure, petite, kind, an ability to communicate with animals and plants, and depends on others to help her change her situation, and needs a male for life fulfillment – especially one who will sweep her away to happily ever after.  And the supporting actresses?  Fairy Godmother, Step-mother/ evil queen and step sisters - no one wants to be cast as the last two characters based the narrative descriptions: mean, ugly, untalented…

Disney isn’t the only one to blame for this spell’s endurance.  The Mirror Mirror Spell is very complex and is embedded in our society’s intricate social, economics, and political networks.   The “Beauty Industry,” an outcome of this spell, is an international, multi-billion dollar industry luring women with “Hope in a Jar Elixir.”  Their commercials echo the prevailing culture by feeding on women’s sense of deficiencies.  They offer self-improvement tutorials: sharing the celebrity beauty secrets of Ellen Degeneres and Queen Latifa (Cover Girl); touting the latest weight loss plans of Marie Osmond (Nutrisystem) and Jennifer Hudson (Weight Watchers).    Television reality shows like “The Swan,” “The Biggest Loser” or “What Not to Wear” are mini-seminars done by shaming and embarrassing the ‘contestant’ into conforming to the ‘ideal.’  Before and after pictures are always included showing the results which anyone can achieve they put in the money, discipline and effort.  The body becomes just another consumer good changeable like re-decorating a house.  Victims of this spell become locked into believing that happily ever after is dependent on these 400 year old notions. 

For me, the Mirror Mirror Spell began to unravel in my late twenties when I read the Naomi Wolf’s The Beauty Myth and similar work done by Jean Kilbourne, Diane Stein and Z. Budapest.  Similarly, it began to fall apart even more when I began to reanalyze the belief that the Body is a Temple for the spirit (Note: a belief found in many faith traditions) that honors Motherfather Spirit by sharing its unique gifts and talents with the Earth.  I began to look at how I treated my body in relations to supporting my physical health to do this work.  I began to examin the foods I ate, identify my methods for handling stress, and the types of exercises I needed.  Each of these points was about me and not about looking or policing other women.  (Note: there isn’t a one size fits all – we weren’t created that way).  It also made me carefully examine the self-hating mental tapes re-running through my mind about my - name the body part that needed to be changed   ("Is that a zit on your chin?”  “Your hair is too straight and brown.”  “Maybe you should get a nose job.”  “You’re getting kind of round around the waist?”).  These recordings showed no respect, value or Divine worship for my Temple.  These recordings only reinforce the Mirror Mirror Spell. 

Dove Campaign - Love your Body

I’m a firm believer that education and mass media campaigns (i.e., Love Your Body) can be used to unravel this spell, but I don’t believe this will be sufficient to crack the mirror. Likewise, I don’t think there will be a wave of the wand moment when the spell is transformed and we all are considered having beautiful bodies and get happily ever after.  However, I do believe we each have a role in making this change in ourselves and helping others like their Temple.  Z. Budapest writes in Sage Woman:  “Women’s Liberation is achieved when I assume responsibility for myself and extend this to other women....Liberation cannot come until you are responsible for yourself.  You assume total responsibility for your choices....When a woman is empowered she finds her mission in life.  An empowered woman looks after civilization, creates art and comforts, and nurtures all that she is invested in.  As she learns more about her own womanhood, she realizes all women are her sisters.”

Activities:

Self-blessing:

There are many wonderful self blessings:

Z. Budapest’s Self Blessing

Diane Stein Self Blessing

This is my favorite done by Fran Frazier of Central Ohio.  She teaches young high school women to do this daily. 

Materials: lotion – your favorite scented or unscented. Or better yet – create your own scent with essential oils (Essential Oil Scents for self love - frankincense, sandalwood, angelica, cedarwood, jasmine, lavender, rose, neroli, rosewood, and myrrh.)

Done daily after getting out of the shower. 

Put dime size amount of lotion in your hand and rub it into your foot saying aloud: “I love my foot.”  Put another dime size of lotion in your hand and do the same with the other foot saying aloud: “I love my foot.”  Continue with each body part telling it aloud that you love it.  (i.e., caves, thighs, hips, bum, stomach, breasts, hands, arms, shoulders, back, neck, face, neck….)

Celebrate National Love Your Body Day - October 17, 2012

For my men friends - you too have been caught in this spell and I would need to write another post on this injustice - check out the work by Jackson Katz - he is doing this work.